Happy New Year!

We want to take this time to wish each and everyone one of you a happy and healthy new year!


And just because...you must relive the gayest thing on all of YouTube.



We'll be back on Monday. Heeeeyyyyyy!

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Year in Review: There Were Scandals and Then There Was Mel Gibson

You know we love a scandal and 2010 was rife with them. Frankly, the year belonged to Mel Gibson. We could tell you about all the racist, homophobic, sexist, anti-Semitic things the actor said to his baby mama, but you'll be best served listening to him say all these racist, homophobic, sexist, anti-Semitic things to his baby mama. The Bible says (we think) whatever you do in the dark shall come to light, so 2010 was the year that Jesus made us all all aware of Ms. Bishop Eddie Long who was -- and has been - raping young boys for years! (Another pastor was dragged out of the closet kicking and screaming, too.) Rumors that Ms. John Travolta is a card-carrying member of the How You Doin coalition have surrounded the actor for years, but in 2010 we learned that not only is she a bottom, she also craves big, black penises. Ehaow!

Poor, Whitney Houston. She embarked on a failed world tour and got caught snorting cocaine in public -- after she told Oprah she was clean -- and now that he's clean and sober, ex-husband Bobby Brown has resolved to help Whitney kick her drug habit.

Haiti suffered a massive earthquake, killing more than 200,000 people. In the aftermath, the rug was pulled from under Wyclef Jean's shady charity, which was caught misappropriating monies intended to help Haitians in Haiti, but instead was helping Haitians (read: Wyclef) in New Jersey. Later in the year he launched a campaign to become president of Haiti; that failed and he was chased out of the country. To add insult to injury: his wife caught him cheating on her.

The Tiger Woods scandal accelerated in 2010. Tapes were released that showed that cops investigating the "accident" that left the golfer with missing teeth and broken bones, covered up some facts. He finally admitted that he's a dog, we learned he's a freak, several women claimed he's the father of their children, and Elin divorced him, walking away with millions in cash and prizes. Then she gave an interview about all of it.

Former singer Raz-B's undiagnosed mental ailment flared up in a big way this year. He said back in the day, pretty much all the members of boy bands B2K, Immature and others were sleeping with each other and the rape-ations were commandeered by their Dear Leader Chris Stokes, who would often rape them, too.

Homewrecker Fantasia Barrino was also a major attention whore. When the wife of her married jumpoff threatened to sue her triflin' ass for millions, Fantasia attempted to "commit suicide" after aborting said married jumpoff's baby and making several sex tapes with him. The Dream also attempted suicide.

In 2010, the ongoing rumor that Oprah and Gayle King are lovers went into overdrive. First, we learned that the couple was planning to adopt a baby, but Oprah squashed the rumors, saying Gayle is NOT her lover, she's her mother. We also learned that the man she thought was her father, probably isn't. Speaking of Teh Gheys: Ray J is gay, Charlamagne is gay, Amy Winehouse is bisexual, Ricky Martin came out, 50 Cent is gay, and the Today show's Matt Lauer jumped off with a tranny. And how could be forget: Queen Latifah is no longer hiding the fact that she's a lesbian. She's out and proud, chile. The gayest city in America was named and yes, it's the one you guessed.

In the world of politics: Some bitch came for Michelle Obama; John Edwards has a a big penis. How do we know this? His sex tape; Sarah Palin was found to be a "fucking retard"; the jumpoff of Washington DC's married mayor said her peace; a NYC congressman "retired" after news broke he sexually assaulted a male staffer; we got to know and love South Carolina's candidate for senate, Cousin It; former vice president Al Gore was accused of rape; down in Texas, politicians are crazy as hell!, or just plain mad; and failed New York gubernatorial candidate Jimmy McMillan is awesome.

Professional athletes were acting up all year long, too, as they always do:
Shaquille O'Neal is a cheater and a hacker, surprisingly. Evander Holyfield's wife said he put the beatdown on her -- while she was pregnant! Wrestler Rick Flair was assaulted -- by his wife. Allen Iverson's life was spiraling out of control, but that could have been a result of his wife divorcing him. Dorell Wright, who plays for the Miami Heat, has a very small penis. Former football star Tiki Barber dumped his pregnant wife for a younger model. Lawrence Taylor paid $300 to have sex with a 16-year-old girl. NFLer Reggie Wayne had a jumpoff. LeBron James gave Cleveland the deuces and the team's owner lost his goddamn mind. Mike Tyson admitted he is a pig. Brandon Jennings might as well come on out of the closet. Dennis Rodman received a professional -- while conducting an interview!

Howard Stern stated the obvious then Jamie Foxx tried to come for Howard. Howard quickly and swiftly put that queen in her place. Feud over.

Real Housewives of Atlanta's NeNe Leakes got her nose did, her husband is divorcing her, her son kept on getting arrested, and she's about to become a grandmother.

Jesse James had a banner year. He was 2010's Tiger Woods. Plus, he's a racist! Within a month, Sandra Bullock divorced his ass.

Mo'Nique admitted that she and her husband have an open relationship and not to be outdone, her brother admitted that he molested the actress/comedian.

Then there was Dwayne Wade and his courtroom battle with ex-wife Siohvaughn Wade, who literally lost her mind. She filed a lawsuit against Dwayne's current girlfriend, Gabrielle Union, and Dwayne revealed that she physically attacked him.

Eternal cheater Mathew Knowles got a jumpoff pregnant; he confessed his sins to wife Tina, then was ordered to pay $82,000 in child support. Ka-ching!

An MTV reality show contestant was arrested for breaking nearly every bone in his 1-year-old daughter's body, while a VH1 "reality star" was busted for statutory rape.

Barry Bonds' son beatdown his own mother, R&B singer Mario was accused of committing the same unspeakable crime.

Remember Sisqo? His baby mama wanted her money.

Michael Jackson's final and official autopsy report was made public.

There was a lot of grease being thrown:
Mz Berry, of For the Love of Ray J fame, went in on her ex-boyfriend; Joan Rivers threw some hot grease at Victoria Beckham; Grace Jones called out Lady Gaga for jacking her swag; and Kim Kardashian's ex-husband said the reality star is nothing more than a conniving, fame whore who's addicted to plastic surgery.

Oprah got four child molesters to reveal how they groom, lure then rape young kids; Apparently, Johnny Depp doesn't bathe; Naomi Campbell attacked another employee; Over in Turkey, a father buried his daughter alive because she talked to boys; The government told a woman she's too stupid to have kids and some folks were outraged; Dude bit off a cop's nipple; A fat lady killed her boyfriend by sitting on him, while another tried to kill her boyfriend with her breasts and a lady bit off her husband's penis, then stabbed him to death.

The world was introduced to Epic Beard Man. (Then the victim spoke out.)

Several members of the Winans family (yes, the gospel singing one) were running a multi-million dollar Ponzi scheme. Not anymore.

Unsurprisingly, a gay prostitution ring was discovered at the Vatican, video footage of a priest having sex with an altar boy surfaced, and a priest was arrested after he stole more than $1 million to spend on male escorts. We still haven't gotten confirmation as to what the fuck is going on this video!? And only a few weeks ago, a pastor broke into a parishioner's home and stole $10,000 in loot.

Many people can't (or chose not to) understand why gay men want to get married, but this adorable 5-year-old boy got it right away.

A lady from Florida (of course!) on her way to a jumpoff's house, crashed her car while shaving her cat trap.

Former R&B crooner D'Angelo was arrested after he tried to solicit a police officer for sex.

Aretha Franklin is said to be suffering from pancreatic cancer and after undergoing surgery, she has only weeks left to live.

The founder of KC and the Sunshine Band was charged with raping young boys.

Dude chopped off his wife's head because she didn't want to have sex with him; a lady stabbed her boyfriend in the nutts because refused to sleep with her

The Negrodian of the Year award went to this guy.

Garcelle Beauvais' husband cheated on her, so she sent an e-mail blast to let the world know about it.

Superhead got a beatdown -- or it was a figment of her own twisted imagination.

Vivica A Fox's younger boyfriend dumped her via press release.

Charges were officially dropped against the man accused of killing Kandi Burruss' ex, AJ Jewell.

Richard Pryor had a cocaine penis, Pam Grier explained in details.

A bus driver found a baby sitting in the middle of the street -- after midnight!

Sarah Ferguson, the Duchess of York, was a prostitution whore!

So was Marilyn Monroe! Back in the 1960s, Marilyn was getting slayed pretty much by everyone (Frank Sinatra, The Kennedy Brothers, etc.) at sex parties.

We all were shocked when we heard that Ne-Yo was accused of having sex with an underage prostitute -- a female prostitute.

Having sex with chickens was all the rage.

Jermaine Dupri threatened to kill a blogger.

JetBlue flight attendant Steven Slater let those bitches have it!

A man grew a vagina and gave birth to a child.

Designer Calvin Klein, 67, is dating a 20-year-old male porn star.

TI and his wife Tiny were arrested on drug charges; he was sent back to jail for a year -- but not before "staging" a PR stunt.

A Duke University female student had sex with more than a dozen male athletes then wrote a thesis about it, describing everything from how she met the boys to how big their penises are to how good or bad they were in bed. It's truly a must-read.

Another must-read: A teacher slapped a 9-year-old student who was misbehaving, so his mother penned an epic 40-page letter (which she sent to President Obama) demanding some pretty OUTRAGEOUS and AMAZING things.

Morgan Freeman's ex-wife took him to the cleaners.

Toni Braxton is horrible at managing her finances; she filed for bankruptcy again.

Surgeons removed a dildo from someone's ass.

A funeral home in Puerto Rico found a unique way to display a corpse.

Jesus Christ was struck by a car in Massachusetts.

This is still the best dance video of the year all time.

Scientists discovered why some men will never get laid.

This allegedly is Kanye West's penis. Remember President George Bush? He went on the record to blame Kanye for the worst moment of his 8-year presidency.

Colleen is her name and she's crazy as hell.

A man was cured of HIV.

In memoriam: Golden Girls' star Rue McClanahan, Teddy Pendergrass, Alexander McQueen, Gary Coleman, and Elizabeth Edwards.

We also laced you up with some Best ofs from Wendy's radio show: Like Shelly, who wanted to have sex with her husband's sister, Gillie Da Kid outing Lil Wayne and Baby, and the Donkey Song.

Get off my mommy! Get off my mommy! Get off my mommy!

See, the year was going pretty smoothly AND THEN this happened!

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WATCH: Public Lashings and Things of That Nature

The generation of "no".


How to escape from a cop: Create a smoke cloud, then vanish into thin air like a ninja. FAIL!


What Had Happened Was: Tina Puccini-Perez, 52, was speeding and running through red lights in Redwood City, Calif. when a cop, with lights and sirens blaring, motioned for her to pull over. Instead, Tina ran through another light and attempted to turn onto another street, when it spun out. As the officer approached the Camaro on foot with his gun drawn, crazy Tina looked at him and abruptly began backing up, narrowly missed hitting the officer and then rammed her car into his car five times. Suffice it to say crazy Tina was arrested and charged with felony assault. She plead not guilty. Ha!


In Saudi Arabia, this man was sentenced to 50 "lashes".




Most obnoxious kid. Ever.




Jordan McCabe. Remember that name.





We're torn on this. An Indiana mother is fighting for the release of her daughter, who's s serving a five-year sentence for biting a police officer during a DUI arrest. Four months into her sentence, doctors diagnosed Betsie Gallardo with stage four cancer; she's also HIV-positive. Her condition is deteriorating and her mother wants her to come home to die, which we understand...but then again, she did commit a crime. Are we to allow everyone who's gravely ill out of prison? Perhaps.




Finally. You may have heard: The kids had a play date on Twitter today, chile. Rape victim Raz-B, who's obsessed with newly-single Rihanna vs Convicted Felon Chris Brown, who was convicted last year of beating her ass. Here's Raz-B's side and CFCB going in. (Sidebar: Hey, Raz-B! Rihanna don't want you!) Update to madness: Raz-B's brother, Ricky Romance, threatened to kill CFCB on video(!) and now the cops are allegedly looking to question him. What a donkey and hee-haw!


What just happened? We're so done with these kids and their games.

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Man, 92, Chews Himself Out of a Bind

We're not saying you shouldn't be kind to strangers, but you should probably not let them into your home. Especially when you live alone. And especially when you're a geriatric. Case in point: A 92-year-old man from Shoreline, Wash. who was left taped to a chair after a home-invasion robbery chewed through the restraints to free himself yesterday.

Detectives said the incident began about 11 a.m. when the man, who lives alone, answered a knock at his door. When the two white men in their 20s asked to use the phone, the homeowner let them into the house and then sat down in a kitchen chair while one man went to use the bathroom, police said. When the man came out of the bathroom, both grabbed the victim's arms and held them while they used masking tape to tape him to the chair, the Sheriff’s Office said. The men spent more than an hour in the house while they looked for valuables and eventually took more than $400 from the victim.

After the robbers left, it took old man Mr Friendly Neighbor two hours for the victim to free himself by chewing through the masking tape. Other than bruises, he was not injured. The two men are still on the loose.


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Couple Forgoes Trip to Dentist, Pulls Out Child's Teeth With Pliers...Now They're in Jail

Jessica Carder, 22, and her boyfriend Andrew Richards, 27, from Madison, Ind. are both charged with felony battery on a child causing serious bodily injury after they pulled out Jessica's 2-year-old son's teeth out with pliers last November. When the child finally went to the hospital, he had two missing teeth, visible swelling of the lips, gum trauma and blood clots. Jessica told police Andrew pulled the boy's loose teeth while he was high on oxycontin. The couple was arrest last Thursday.



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WATCH: Unicorn Sex, Hillbillies, Village People

Man sexually assaults unicorn.


During the halftime show at a recent Florida State vs UConn basketball game, one man gave an entire Village People concert:




FIGHT! Beatdown at the Washington Redskins game last weekend.



In Russia, truck drowns you:




Hundreds of people try to board one bus last Sunday in London:




"Hillbillies" take it to the (dance) floor:




The annual year-end beatdown has happened in Chumbilbilca, Peru. Each year villagers settle scores and vent-up anger by beating up each other during a festival called Takanakuy. No one is usually injured seriously and the day ends with hugs and a celebratory dance.

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Pastor Caught Breaking Into, Stealing From Parishioner's Home

Sandy McGriff is a career criminal, drug addict, liar and a thief. So, obviously she's parlayed those gifts (from God, no doubt) into becoming a pastor. On Christmas Eve, police charged the 52-year-old with theft after she was caught climbing through a broken window (which she broke) of a parishioner's home in Dallas, Texas, then trying to get away with $10,000 in stolen fur coats and laptop computers in her black Jaguar. What a donkey! Hee-haw!



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Two-Headed Baby Born in India

A two-head baby boy was born in the Indian city of Tirupati on Dec. 22, according to news reports. The child died an hour later. Doctors believe the boy might have formed a second head after his twin stopped developing in the womb.



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WATCH: Diner Brawl, Snowpocalyspe 2010, Hate Speech Peddlers

Brawl breaks out at Mel's Diner in West Hollywood. SMH!



It's Snowpocalyspe 2010! An epic snow storm blanketed the NYC area with more than 20" of snow last night. Michael Black of Delmar, NJ made this time lapse of the snow fall. (He condensed 20 hours of video in this 40-second clip.]



A NYC Santitation truck destroys a Ford Explorer.




Meanwhile in Yonkers, NY this morning....




Whew! CNN fill-in anchor Martin Savidge is out of breath.




This couple got grandchildren for Christmas.




While you were at home or en route to your holiday destination, these six ignant, donkeys were spreading hate at an Oklahoma City bus terminal on Christmas Eve. They need Jesus. Furthermore, if you put a hood on these donkeys they would be the black KKK.




How You Doin, Santa! (NSFW)

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Happy Holidays From Wendyista

It's the holidays. We don't know what you'll be doing, but we're queening out to the divas and queens who make Christmas bright.

We'll be back on Monday, but here are some of the week's lowlights (and some highlights, too).

1. Marital discord was the theme of the week, apparently. For instance, a woman bit off her husband's penis then shot stabbed him dead; a woman found out her husband is actually a woman -- a year into their marriage; a man is going to prison for kissing his wife's ass; and a man shot his bride, best man and then himself dead at their wedding ceremony!
2. Meanwhile, a man was caught using a fake penis.
3. Researchers found that water causes cancer.
4. This donkey isn't winning any Step-mother of the Year award anytime soon. Never.
5. These were the videos that kept us laughing. These, too. And, of course, these!
6. A lady walked into a grocery store and pissed in the freezer. Classy.
7. The Killer is on the loose! The Killer is on the loose! The Killer is on the loose!

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WATCH: Man Attempts Suicide in Romanian Parliament, Child Molester, Naked Sports Fan

Adrian Sobaru is nothing if not an attention whore. Well, he could be mentally ill, too. The 40-year-old, who's an electrician at the national TV network, jumped from the balcony (about 23 feet) of the Parliament today as the prime minister was speaking. He survived. On his way to the hospital, he shouted "Liberty and Justice." He also wore a shirt with the slogan: "You've killed our future." (He was apparently angry over the government's decision to discontinue the monthly payments for his disabled child.)


What. The. Hell?!!!!!!!!!!! No, seriously. What the fuck is this and has anyone called DFCS yet?!?



This little boy is gonna be on the sex offender registry in no time.




In an effort to become the latest meme, this fat ass gets butt nekkid after the Philadelphia Eagles won.




Even a 3-year-old knows that books are not toys.



Speaking of kids:



Happy holidays from Space:

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Man Faces Jail Time For Kissing Wife's Ass

An Australian man pleaded guilty this afternoon to indecent assault charges after his estranged wife became upset when he kissed her ass.

The court heard the unemployed 48-year-old - who cannot be identified - had been drinking when he went to his wife's Hobart home in June 2009 to talk with her. She was lying on a bed and he twice asked her to turn over on to her stomach. When she refused he forcibly rolled her over, straddled her, pulled down her pants and kissed her on the bottom as she screamed "No, no!" When the couple's children ran into the room, the victim explained she had been tickled, but the man made a vulgar comment, the court heard. Defence lawyer Anne-Marie Kerr said her client had intended the kiss as an act of foreplay to lift the spirits of his depressed wife but admitted he had gone to far. "He is extremely embarrassed," she said.

The man and woman were married for 21 years before separating.

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Have You Seen The Killer?

This man casually wheeling a suitcase through the streets of Harlem (New York City) shortly before midnight Tuesday, isn't on his way to grandma's house. He's The Killer! About an hour after this video was shot, a man rummaging through trash, stumbled upon the suitcase. When he opened it, he found the body of a 28-year-old stuffed inside; A plastic bag was wrapped over the woman's head and there was a pool of blood pooled inside the suitcase and on the sidewalk below. The medical examiner said the cause of death is neck compression and the case has been classified a homicide. Ugh, duh! If you know this man, he's The Killer -- call police!


Update, Dec 28: The Killer was arrested! THE NYPD arrested Malik Hassan, 55, on Dec. 27 and charged him with the murder of 28-year-old Betty Williams. Mailk (pictured, below) reportedly confessed to paying Betty for sex and killing her afterward when "he noticed she was taking more money." As police were leading him away, a reporter asked if he was sorry for what he allegedly did. He replied: "Yes."







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Lady Urinates in Grocery Store's Freezer

Last Saturday, 23-year-old Carrie Harkness of Meadville, Pa., was arrested and charged with criminal mischief and disorderly conduct after the mother of two walked into a convenience store and urinated in a freezer, ruining $508 worth of cookies, bagels, and other baked goods.

She apparently peed in the freezer because she was upset when employees was asked her to leave the store.

After the incident, she reportedly posted on her Facebook page: “Omg have you ever liked someone so much and go out with them and make a fool of yourself????? wish I could take back friday night!!!!!But youngstown is on point wish my friend could forgive me!!!!!!”

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Brazilian Shotgun Wedding

Last Friday in Brazil, Rogerio Damascena, 29, married Renata Alexandre Costa Coelho, 25. At the reception on Saturday he shot her, his best friend Marcelo Guimaraes, 40, before committing suicide.

Homicide detective Joao Brito said: "It was about 2pm and the party was in full swing when he left the room saying he had a surprise, then came back shooting the woman and at other people. "He drew his gun and shot the bride in the chest region. She was cornered and had no chance to defend herself. He took another shot, hitting her in the head. He then fired several times at the best man, who was also his boss and friend. Even when he could see that Marcelo was wounded, he shot him in the back of the neck. Then he shot himself in the head." The detective said he believed the bloodbath was planned in advance because the groom had hidden the weapon in his father's pickup truck. The bride's brother Roberto Guerra told a local newspaper: "The party was going brilliantly until 2am. He left for five minutes, and when he came back he embraced my sister, gave her a kiss on the back of the neck and then started shooting."

No one understands why he committed the crime, although some believe Rogerio's actions stemmed from jealously. Renata and Marcelo died at the scene; Rogerio passed at the hospital.


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WATCH: Christmas Dancing, Caroling, Eating

Yesterday, more than 5,000 took part in a flash mob at a mall in Roseville, Calif. (Sidebar: The mall had to be evacuated after reports of the foundation moving -- not because of the singing -- which was beautiful -- but because the foundation was moving and some people heard creaks.)


The new TLC show, My Strange Addiction, is something else. This bitch is addicted to eating toilet paper....



..while this one is addicted to sleeping with a blow dryer:




The masturbating cat is in the MFing building!




Bitch, why are you waving balloons in my face? Ugh.




Remember the reason for the season:




Luckily this Israeli soccer player is extremely good looking, because his English is shit.




Chelsea Handler got the memo about Puffy, chile. How You Doin', girlfriend. Alllrriiiiggghhht!!!




To protest the madness going on in the Ukrainian parliament, a reporter donned a bunny costume to interview a politician:

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WATCH: Deer Rescue, Be Careful Pulling Out, Green With Envy

Last Friday, rescuers risked their lives to save two deer stranded on the frozen Mississippi River. [giving the rescuers a round of applause]


This old man decides to fight a ticket the hard way and ruin the cop's day.




OMFG! We're booking a flight today to go to Austria because we've gotta see the Grüner See (Green Lake) in person. Per Wikipedia: The lake "dries out almost completely in the fall. In the spring the lake is filled with snow melt runoff. This gives the lake crystal clear water, the existing rocks and meadow give the lake its green color." Have you ever seen anything more beautiful?




Sadly, we've got to end with something ugly -- a FIGHT! Outside of a bar in New York City, a bouncer disciplines a drunk.

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Meet Stepmom From Hell

To say Renee Lester of Cleveland is a monster, would be kind. The 46-year-old was arrested last weekend for arrested for child endangering and domestic violence after cops found that she was abusing three of her stepchildren. The children were locked in the attic, basement and not allowed to use the bathroom. Renee installed installed an alarm that would go off if anyone tried to use the toilet and told them just to "hold it" and she took all of the light bulbs out of the room so the kids would be in complete darkness. All of the doors were doubled locked. Her four biological children, on the other hand, were living like little prince and princesses. Luckily, DYFS swooped in and took away all seven kids.


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This Concludes Today's Penis Talk

Christmas came early for gramps.


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Man Caught Using Fake Penis

Raymond Hartley, of Effort, Pa., was ordered to pay a fine and court costs after admitting he used a fake penis for a drug test; He claimed he purchased the a fake penis and bladder because probation officials made fun of his real penis.

"It's very emasculating to hear comments like that," argued defense attorney Anthony Rybak. Judge Michael Koury Jr. didn't buy it and on Friday sentenced Hartley, a convicted burglar, to one to two years in state prison for violating probation. In doing so, Koury noted that Hartley had earlier admitted to a misdemeanor stemming from his possession of the Whizzinator, which can be bought over the Internet with kits that include synthetic urine and heater packs. "He pleaded guilty to it," Koury noted. "In open court." Hartley, 28, of Chestnuthill Township, was under supervision after completing a four- to eight-month prison sentence for his part in the burglary of a construction site in Bushkill Township in October 2008. Hartley told Koury that he struggles with drug addiction but has been clean. The urine in the Whizzinator was his, and he used the device only because of what his probation officers in Monroe County were saying, he said.

I can't! No ma'am. Wait! Is Raymond this person? We know he's not this guy.


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Lady Bites Off Husband's Penis Then Stabs Him to Death

A Thai woman killed her husband Monday morning after he requested third-input (read: anal) sex and a professional. Mali Siritham (pictured in pink) said 47-year-old Pairoj Farkgai, who's a senior official at the Ministry of Defense, forcibly tried have third input. When she refused, he forced her to give him a professional. During the act, she bit off his penis and stabbed him in the stomach (he stabbed her first).

Mrs. Mali later explained to police that she and her former husband had been living together for about 5 years and had two children. She said Mr. Pairoj was lecherous and flirted with many women. His behaviour became intolerable and they had decided to divorce 7 months ago. Mr. Pairoj then went to work in Bangkok but he always came to see their daughters twice a week. On the night of the incident, he had arrived in a very drunken state and demanded to have sex with her but she refused, telling him that she was having her period. Mrs. Mali said he became very angry and tried to force her to have anal sex but she resisted. He then pushed her on the bed and beat her up and forced her to give him oral sex. Mrs. Mali said she was in tears, and decided to bite off his penis. Mr. Pairoj then grabbed a knife which had been placed on top of the bed and stabbed her on her right arm. She said they were fighting over the knife for about 10 minutes when she finally grabbed the knife from him and stabbed him once in the stomach. Mr. Pairoj then collapsed on the floor and Mrs. Mali ran out of the room to get help from her father and her neighbour. By the time they came back into the room, Mr. Pairoj was already dead.

That'll learn him.

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After a Year of Marriage, Woman Discovers Her 'Husband' Is a Woman

An Indian woman, Minati Khatua, (pictured) got the shock of her life recently after the man she married turned out to be a woman -- and a thief.

Minati, who was on a visit to her sister’s place in Rourkela two months before her marriage was approached by Sitakant Routray, a 28-year-old youth who claimed to be a friend of her brother. “He somehow had my mobile number and kept calling me now and then,” Minati said. Soon, Sitakant, who worked as a salesman for private firm, proposed Minati for marriage and approached her family. “He had impressed everyone in my family and they willingly agreed to our marriage,” said Minati. However, when Sitakant was asked to call his parents for talks, he seemed to avoid and made excuses. “After repeated requests from our side, he brought along two persons with him and introduced them as his aunt and brother. It was later that we came to know that they were not his real relatives,” she said. The aunt and brother were the only members present during their wedding on 14 September, 2009. The marriage was later registered in court and the so-called ‘aunt’ and ‘brother’ stood witness from the groom’s side.

....

In August this year, Sitakant’s family, including his mother, brothers and sisters visited Rourkela. “While others left, his mother stayed back with us for two months. The way she enquired me about our married life led me to be suspicious,” said Minati. “Ever since, I would try hard to find out and confirm his gender but failed repeatedly. However, one day I managed to force open the bathroom door when he was having a bath. My worst fears came true. He was a woman,” she added. However, Sitakant started crying and pleaded for forgiveness. He admitted that he had done a mistake and said he would come out with a ‘compromise’. “His brothers would call me up threatening to kill me and my family members if I inform others that my husband is a female. I was in a complete disaster. Finally I decided to approach the police today,” said Minati.

By the time Minati realized what was really going on, Sitakanta/Smutimoyee vanished with a car and a jeep bought with two bank loans Minati's name.

Yes, we know you're asking: Did they have sex? The answer is no. Whenever she made any attempt to do the do with her “husband,” he said they should wait for a few months more as “he” wanted to conduct a puja in a temple in Puri (a Hindi religious ritual) before having a sexual relationship with her.


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The One in Which We Find Out How Water Causes Cancer

A study by the Environmental Working Group has found that drinking water in 35 American cities contains hexavalent chromium, a probable carcinogen that was made famous by the film "Erin Brockovich."

The group found hexavalent chromium in the tap water of 31 out of 35 cities sampled. Of those, 25 had levels that exceeded the goal proposed in California, which has been trying aggressively to reduce the chemical in its water supply. The federal Environmental Protection Agency is considering whether to set a limit for hexavalent chromium in tap water. The agency is reviewing the chemical after the National Institutes of Health, deemed it a "probable carcinogen" in 2008. Hexavalent chromium has long been known to cause lung cancer when inhaled, and scientists recently found evidence that it causes cancer in laboratory animals when ingested. It has been linked in animals to liver and kidney damage as well as leukemia, stomach cancer and other cancers. A widely used industrial chemical until the early 1990s, hexavalent chromium still used in some industries, such as in chrome plating and the manufacturing of plastics and dyes. The chemical can also leach into groundwater from natural ores.

No word yet as to what we should do.

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California became the first state to limit the chemical in drinking water by proposing a "public health goal" of 0.06 parts per billion. These are the cities tested for the study:

Norman, Okla. - 12.9 ppb
Honolulu, Hi. - 2.00 ppb
Riverside, Calif. - 1.69 ppb
Madison, Wis. - 1.58 ppb
San Jose, Calif. - 1.34 ppb
Tallahassee, Fla. - 1.25 ppb
Omaha, Neb. - 1.07 ppb
Albuquerque, N.M. - 1.04 ppb
Pittsburgh, Pa. - 0.88 ppb
Bend, Ore. - 0.78 ppb
Salt Lake City, Utah - 0.30 ppb
Ann Arbor, Mich. - 0.21 ppb
Atlanta, Ga. - 0.20 ppb
Los Angeles, Calif. - 0.20 ppb
Bethesda, Md. - 0.19 ppb
Phoenix, Ariz. - 0.19 ppb
Washington, D.C - 0.19 ppb
Chicago, Ill. - 0.18 ppb
Milwaukee, Wis. - 0.18 ppb
Villanova, Pa. - 0.18 ppb
Sacramento, Calif. - 0.16 ppb
Louisville, Ky. - 0.14 ppb
Syracuse, N.Y. - 0.12 ppb
New Haven, Conn. - 0.08 ppb
Buffalo, N.Y. - 0.07 ppb
Las Vegas, Nev. - 0.06 ppb
New York, N.Y. - 0.06 ppb
Scottsdale, Ariz. - 0.05 ppb
Miami, Fla. - 0.04 ppb
Boston, Mass. - 0.03 ppb
Cincinnati, Ohio - 0.03 ppb
Indianapolis, Ind. - not detected
Plano, Texas - not detected
Reno, Nev. - not detected
San Antonio, Texas - not detected

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Donkey Commits a Caper, Calls Cops for Getaway Ride

On Tuesday, Zannish Schmeka Frazier, 28, of West Linn, Ore. called police for a ride to the closet bus station after she broke into a home and car and stole several duffel bags full of stuff. Zannish told police she was cold, wet, scared and stranded and needed to take the bus to her mother's house.

When officers arrived they found the woman carrying six duffel bags, four filled with her personal items and the others with two laptops, women's clothes and jewelry. Police said they also found a small note with clothing size measurements as well. "It was almost like she went Christmas shopping," [Sgt. Neil Hennelly] said. Frazier was arrested and taken to Clackamas County jail after officers discovered she had an outstanding warrant for a parole violation. Later that night, police received a call from a resident on Charman Street who reported someone had broken through a back window and taken some items while they were away. Hennelly said police had found a car about 200 feet away from the home on Grant Street that had also been broken almost an hour before Frazier's call for a ride.

Suffice it to say, Zannish wasn't taken to the bus station. She was arrested and charged with burglary, unlawful entry to a motor vehicle and theft. Plus, get this: there was a warrant out for arrest because she violated parole. (That arrest stemmed from a previous theft charge.) Hee-haw!




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WATCH: 5 Teens Attack Pregnant Girl

This is utterly despicable and disgusting. Police just released video of a pregnant girl and her boyfriend being attacked by a group of four girls and a woman on a Seattle bus last month -- and no one called 911!

According to police, a 19-year-old woman, three 16-year-old girls and a 14-year-old girl boarded the bus via the rear doors around 7pm.

"Me and my boyfriend got on the bus and we were listening to our Zune -- he had a headphone; I had a headphone -- and then the girls came on," said 17-year-old Jessica, who is due in June and was returning home after doctor checkup told KOMO 4 News. "I didn't know them so I wasn't expecting anything and one of them started saying something to my boyfriend....Basically I was turned around, one of the girls hit me from the back,. I turned around to ask 'hey, what are you doing?' and then three of the other ones started hitting me."

Jessica says she turned around again and was struck in the eye and began bleeding profusely. She mentioned twice that she was pregnant and said she didn't want to fight them, but she says one of the girls made the comment, "well, nobody hit her in the stomach."

As the attack was occurring, three of the girls stole items from the boyfriend's pockets.

When the bus pulled over, the assailants escaped. Three of them were arrested an half hour after the incident and the other other two were arrested a few days later. The 19-year-old was charged with assault and the other four girls were charged with second degree robbery. All five girls have prior arrest. Jessica is OK, save for the six stitches she received for her eye.

Question: Where was Epic Beard Man?

Sidebar: This is the unedited video of the unprovoked beatdown:





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The One in Which Being Kind to an Old Lady Lands You in Jail

On Wednesday, 70-year-old Sandra Leanne Bathke asked Luke Weimart, her landlord, to drive her to bank because she needed to withdraw cash to pay her rent. Instead, Leanne walked into the bank told the teller she had a gun and give her all the money and Luke, well, he unwittingly became the getaway driver.


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Man Posts 'No Negro's Allowed' Sign in Front of Strip Club

An Abbotsford, Wisc. (yes, it's a very, very, very small town) man is probably seeking attention or he's just not very bright. Earlier this month, Mark Prior posted a sign that reads "No Negro's Allowed" at the entrance of his soon-to-be-open strip club because he believes he has a right to. He doesn't. "I'm going to stick to my guns because I think I have the right as a business owner to reject service to anyone," he says. "It's not all the black people there are just a few bad ones." Perhaps he should read the Civil Rights Act of 1964, which expressly prohibits discrimination based on race, color, religion, sex, and national origin.



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WATCH: Hurdler Shows You How It's Done, Gaga Kills Santa, Little Hard-ons and More!

Hurdles? What hurdles? This is the flat 100m, no?


Lady Gaga killed Santa during a show in London. She says: "Oh, look it's Santa. Well I do like Christmas, but for those of you who are feeling lonely this Christmas...you know, just to keep everyone happy...I hate the holidays! I'm alone and miserable you fucking dumb bit of joy!...He was pregnant with chemicals not meant for children."




Australian comedian and musician Tim Minchin (who wrote an awesome song about the Pope) is back with the best song (OK, the only song) we've heard about a blow-up doll. It's called “Inflatable You." Please do enjoy.




Little hardons have just as much fun at Christmas as big hardons, apparently:




Parrot sings "Let the Bodies Hit the Floor." Kinda picthy, dawg. (Sidebar: Did you see the dancing bird? Then you must.)



During an ice hockey game last Sunday in Canada, fans littered the ice with 23,000 teddy bears -- for charity:




Set you DVRs for this show!




Insanely dumb! A Harlem man has created something that didn't need to be created -- "sub" for saggers.




FIGHT! A brawl broke out in Ukraine's parliament yesterday that sent at least six lawmakers to the hospital with concussions, a fractured jaw and multiple bruises.




The Christmas tree at the Emirates Palace hotel in Abu Dhabi is the most expensive in the world. Why? The tree alone was $10,000 and there are 181 diamonds, pearls, emeralds, sapphires, and other precious stones used to decorate the tree which cost $11.5 million!




Lil Kim was on Hot 97 today to kvetch to Angie Martinez about Nicki Minaj and Puffy. She says she doesn't dislike Nicki and isn't looking for drama, but fells like Nicki is not respecting those who came before her. As for Puffy, Kim says he's disloyal and brands hims the most “negative positive person ever.” Grease!

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