Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Man Fined For Assaulting Cop With His Penis

Marium Varinauskas, a 28-year-old Lithuanian police officer, plead guilty yesterday and fined about $900 for assaulting another police officer with his penis.

What Had Happened Was: It was 1am on a day last November and Marium (pictured) was pissy drunk. His girlfriend tried to kick him out of the house because he was becoming belligerent. So, she called police. When cops arrived, they Marium him sitting on the sofa wearing a pair of boxers. A female officer sat on a nearby sofa to interrogate him and that's when the assault took place.

The police report said: "The accused got to his feet and was standing over the police officer exposing (himself) .... forcing her to take evasive action to avoid getting struck."

Must be a really big penis.

Anyhoo, during sentencing, Marium admitted that he was wrong, although he doesn't remember a thing.

"I had too much to drink and don't remember anything," Marium said. "I was going to bed and was just wearing my pants. I feel quite bad about it all but it's difficult to say anything because I don't remember."

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