Monday, September 27, 2010

Bishop Eddie Long: 'I Gon' Fight' Sex Charges...So Keep Sending in Those Tithes and Offerings! Jesus Says So. Plus, I Need a New iPad

How You Doin pastor Eddie Long aka "Dick Tracy" donning his best Sunday wig, spoke to his congregants yesterday morning, several days after four men filed lawsuits accusing the 57-year-old of abusing his power, showering them with gifts and coerced the teens into having sex with him.

The homophobic, two-faced and hypocritical pastor vowed to fight the charges in court (but we know the cases will probably be settled). During his sermon yesterday morning, however, not once did he say he's innocent. Not once.
There have been allegations and attacks made on me. I have never in my life portrayed myself as a perfect man. But I am not the man that’s being portrayed on the television. That’s not me. That is not me. By the counsel of my lawyers, they have advised me not to try this case in the media. I am not gon' try this case in the media. It will be tried in the court of justice and dealt with in the court of justice and please understand because that's the only place I think I'll get justice, but being in the hands of God. Please hear this. Please hear this: I’ve been accused. I’m under attack. I want you to know, as I said earlier, I am not a perfect man. But this thing I’m gon' fight. And I want you to to know one other thing. I feel like David against Goliath, but I’ve got five rocks and I haven’t thrown one yet.
Sidebar: What really is irking us, aside from the pastor's reported predatory and pedophilic actions, is what's going on the video above. Why are these obviously brained-washed people clapping, whooping and hollering and otherwise carrying on for a man who's accused of having sex with boys? Seriously, WTF!

Sidebar #2: This hilarity has been making its way around the Net today. We gagged when he said: "Where my young people at? Where my lil shawty at? Where there at?" What?!? Is this a church or is this a cult? What's really going on here.

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