You can begin the hee-hawing for Robert J. Michelson, because this fella is the Donkey of the Month! The 21-year-old Farmington, Ct. resident was planning on doing some "farming" on his own, so he called up some experts for some free legal advice for a "crime in progress." Robert called 911 last night to ask how much trouble he could get into for growing weed. [You can listen to the phone call, above.] Unsurprisingly, he was tracked down and arrested. When cops swooped down on his home, they discovered Robert was growing marijuana. He admitted to police he has spent "a lot of money online buying everything he needed to grow marijuana, including the seeds." Officers seized a small amount of marijauna and numerous items of drug paraphernalia for smoking and growing the drug. He was charged with possession of drug paraphernalia in a drug factory, possession of less than four ounces of marijuana, illegal cultivation of marijuana and possession of drug paraphernalia; he was released on $5,000 bond. But before leaving the police station, Richard gave one final goodbye to the dispatcher who helped him out: two middle fingers, "presumably for doing such a good job," police said. This fella needs a Darwin Award.