Friday, December 18, 2009

Man Sues Attorney Who Bit Off His Nose Then Swallowed It

A man has filed a $5 million lawsuit against a Memphis, Tennessee attorney (yes, an attorney) who bit off then swallowed a part of his nose during a fight in a restaurant bathroom last June.


Greg Herbers claims attorney Mark Lambert attacked him after he asked two men in a bathroom stall to get out so that he could use it.

The suit states that the attorney was at a urinal while carrying on a conversation with the men in the stall. (Sidebar: Why were two men together in a bathroom stall? But we digress. [Addendum: The suit says the men were “performing some activity other than going to the bathroom.” Chile.]) Greg then says the attorney pushed and grabbed him and bit off and swallowed part of his nose.

The attorney, who claims he acted in self defense after Greg assaulted him, admitted biting off part of the man's nose, but he never swallowed it. 'Cause that would be gross and completely unethical.

After the assault, Greg's entire left nostril was missing and he claims he suffered permanent disfigurement and will need plastic surgery and possibly a prosthetic nose.

At least he didn't bite off then swallow the man's penis. By the way, did we ever find Michael Jackson's missing nose? Greg could use it.


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