Friday, September 16, 2011

The One Where Mike Tyson Tells Us Why Sarah Palin Is Not a Bad Person

Earlier this week, the Internets was set ablaze by excerpts from an upcoming tell-all about Sarah Palin. According to the biography written by Joe McGinniss, the former Alaska governor and staunch Republican has a fetish for black guys and lived out those fantasizes while working as a sports reporter in 1987. The book claims Sarah boned 6'8" NBA star Glen Rice (who was a college junior at the time) in her sister's dorm room while he was in Alaska for Thanksgiving. (She married Todd Palin eight months later.) Glen has confirmed the slay-ation, but the book claims Sarah was "horrified" about having sex with a black man. During an interview with ESPN Radio yesterday, Mike Tyson was asked to comment and boy did she comment.

Here's the audio:

“Glen Rice is a wonderful man. He’s a wonderful guy,” Tyson said, “But you want her to be with somebody like [Dennis] Rodman getting up in there. Pushing her guts up in the back of her head!...Glen Rice is a nice, mellow, docile man, non-threatening black guy — you want someone like Rodman — yeah baby! Imagine Palin with a big old black stallion ripping — heehaw!”...In life in general you know, everybody gotta get that out of their system when they get out of college. If you’re a black man, every white girl, every uppity middle class — everybody gotta get their share of love.....“Isn’t that beautiful to hear Palin got boned out by a black dude?....She could always get boned out by a black person — a vote to bang her. Other than a vote to run office, the only thing she can do … she’s not a bad person because she likes black people … at least in her....When you think of Glen Rice, you don’t think of him coming back from Georgia and just slamming … you don’t think of that stuff!....Sarah Palin … she met the womb shifter.”

audio and transcript via Larry Brown Sports
We need to take a shower.

Sidebar: The book also suggests that Sarah snorted cocaine off an oil drum while on a snowmobiling trip with friends shortly before she was elected Alaska Governor in 2006 and she allegedly smoked weed while a student and had a six-month affair with her husband Todd's business partner, Brad Hanson, in 1996. The book claims Sarah threw out a part of houisegusts after she suspect they were having sex with baby oil. It also accuses Sarah of being a “bad mother” who neglects her five children and describes her propensity for sleeping naked on high school athletic trips.

And here's Sarah reporting on Glen -- after the slay-ation.

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