Doc: Gay Sex, Masturbation Cause Swine Flu

If you're gay or masturbates you will contract Swine Flu. If you're gay and masturbates, well, there's no hope for you.

That's according to a Malaysian doctor who claims to have spent decades researching the issue.

Dr V.M. Palaniappan, a practitioner of complementary therapy, told a local newspaper homosexual acts and masturbation cause the body to become hyperacidised and make the body "an easy target for H1N1."

Dr Palaniappan (pictured, inset) claims that his 33 years of research shows that ”when one masturbates, or indulges in homosexual activity, his (her) body develops friction heat, and that produces acid, making the body hyperacidised, giving burning sensation while urinating and toileting, and making the person an easy target for H1N1 infection.”

He claims that dry masturbation, which he says ”most men, irrespective of their marital status and age," engage in, but that it is "extremely rare among females of all age groups," is dangerous for the same reason.

Those who practice straight sex (read: straight people) or drink coconut water are safe from contracting the H1N1 virus, commonly known as Swine Flu.

Do you think Dr Palaniappan and the other doctor who believes yoga cures homosexuality hold meetings where they come up with this ish?


source