White Man Driving Through Black Neighborhood Says He's Victim of Racial Profiling, Sues for $12 Million

Here's something you don't hear every day. A white man has slapped the city of Houston with a $12 million lawsuit claiming his civil rights were violated and he's the victim of racial profiling. According to the pro se lawsuit, Kelly D Allen says he was driving through a black neighborhood in June 2009 when cops pulled him over, handcuffed and searched him because a drug informant told them a white man was in the area buying weed. Kelly (not pictured) says he was released once the informant told officers they had the wrong man. He is suing for $400,000 in mental anguish and $12 million in punitive damages, claiming he suffered "severe personal injury because he could not use his hands to hold on to anything" while he was cuffed. He says he filed a complaint with HPD Internal Affairs Division, but that case was quickly dismissed without an investigation. The utterly frivolous case against the City of Houston will he heard next March. Good luck with that.

source: KPRC

Tranny Jailed For Injecting Cement, Fix-a-Flat into Woman's Butt Speaks Out: I'm the Victim, My Life is Ruined

Oneal Ron Morris, the tranny who's charged with operating as an unlicensed doctor after several women came forward claiming she injected Fix-a-Flat and cement into their backsides, has given her "first and last interview." In the interview with ET, Oneal says she's the victim and since no one saw her inject the dangerous substance, she didn't do it. She says, "They didn’t catch me doing anything. So they are just allegations. So I’m innocent. I really am innocent or whatever." Are you really? Are you sure? “It sounds bizarre, but how could America feel like a person would even put cement in somebody’s bottom, you know it’s just these allegations, I didn’t do any of these things to these people, just know these people who are lying are ruining my life, that’s all I have to say," she adds. "These allegations...I didn't do any of these things to these people, just know these people who are lying are ruining my life. They keep on lying, but you know, the truth will prevail and that's why we have courts and stuff like that....If anybody's a victim, it's definitely me." Gwarl, you know this isn't your last interview. What's next? "The Today Show"? "Wendy"?



source: WFOR

Deaf Couple Forced Out of Apartment After Neighbors Complain They're Too Loud

A noisy neighbor is no fun. We get it. If you communicate to that neighbor to quiet down, however, often times they will oblige. But what some people did to a deaf couple in Germany is just disgraceful.

A deaf couple have decided to move out of their apartment in the western German state of North Rhine-Westphalia after neighbours complained they were just too loud. Mike Dumröse, 34, und Natascha Neitzel, 25, have lived together in the city of Hagen for about six months now. Deaf from birth, they communicate through sign language. They also enjoy music by turning songs up full blast in order to feel the vibrations in the walls and floor. But all the noise has annoyed neighbours, according to the Westdeutsche Allgemeine Zeitung (WAZ). “They’re too loud. The other renters have constantly complained,” their landlord Achim Hengesbach told the WAZ. When the couple found out about the complaints, they were so upset that they decided to leave their apartment and set up a tent at a local park. City officials who found them there felt bad about their situation and moved them to a hotel while the couple searched for, and eventually found, a new place to live, the WAZ reported. Now there are a few nights to go at their old apartment. They’re spending it watching TV and sleeping on an old mattress in a bare room. But they’re not turning up the music in celebration. And though a bit embarrassed, they don’t seem to bear any ill will toward others for all they’ve been through. “Love. Luck,” wrote Neitzel when asked by the WAZ what they hope to achieve in their new accommodation, without saying whether they’ll be playing music there.

source: The Local

Using Wi-Fi on Laptop Kills Sperm: study

Last year, urologists discovered that men sitting with a laptop balanced on his knees can increase the temperature of his genital areas to levels that can damage sperm, but a recent study shows that surfing the Internet using a wireless connection on your laptop "damages" sperm. What?!

Evidence of DNA damage was also found in the tests undertaken by the team from the Nascentis Centre for Reproductive Medicine in Cordoba, Argentina and and the Eastern Virginia Medical School. In comparison, sperm that was stored at the same temperature but away from a laptop showed a smaller drop in mobility and a significant reduction in DNA damage. Meanwhile, semen placed under the computer without the wi-fi connected did not experience significant levels of sperm damage. “Our data suggest that the use of a laptop computer wirelessly connected to the internet and positioned near the male reproductive organs may decrease human sperm quality,” said Dr Conrado Avendano, who led the study. "At present we do not know whether this effect is induced by all laptop computers connected by Wi-Fi to the internet or what use conditions heighten this effect." The findings differ from previous studies because fears over links between infertility and laptops have focused on heat emitted by the devices. In the latest study, researchers took sperm specimens from 29 healthy men, aged 26 to 45. Each donor sample was separated out into two pots and either placed under a laptop using wireless technology or away from the computer. Scientists then used the laptop to download information from the internet for four hours. They found that 25 per cent of the sperm under the laptop had stopped moving and nine per cent showed DNA damage. By comparison, just 14 per cent of samples kept away from the wi-fi stopped moving while just three per cent suffered DNA damage. Dr Avendano stressed the results did not necessarily mean the same would occur in a real-life setting, adding that men should not unduly worry.

source: The Telegraph

So, the moral of this story: If you must use a computer, use a desktop, but, if you know what's good for you, do so while standing up.

WATCH: Dog Shoots Man in Butt, Another Racist British Woman Rants

Robert Cottingham doesn't want to talk about it, but recently a yellow labrador named Piper shot the 46-year-old in the butt with a 12-guage shot gun.




A Georgia lawmaker has introduced a bill that require those receiving unemployment benefits to volunteer at least 24 hours a week at charities. The Department of Labor may have a problem with that.





Apparently, if a Howard University employee sexually assaults students on campus, Howard administrators turn the other. So, that's a lawsuit! Work study students Mercedes Woodson, Rukayatu Bello and three others say their supervisor, George Bright-Abu, assaulted them last November and when they reported the incidences to administrators, they claim the university wanted them to "overlook" it. George was eventually arrested was charged with misdemeanor sexual abuse and assault and last July was sentenced to 60 days in prison and probation.





Meanwhile, in Philadelphia, three boys (ages 10 and 11) are accused of attempting to rape an 8-year-old boy in a bathroom at West Philadelphia's Bryant Elementary School. The boys were arrested and charged with attempted rape and the victim has transferred to another school.






What the hell is going on London's public transport?!!! Last week a woman was arrested after she went on an epic racist rant and now this video of a woman (who looks like the first woman or could be her relative) goes off on immigrants. Quick, someone call Al Sharpton!





A 20-year-old victim who was kidnapped at gunpoint while on her way to the gym then raped by serial rapist, 19-year-old Robert Lauderdale, tells her harrowing story.






This is an outrage! Elderly residents of a Bronx, NY apartment building are risking their life and health and essentially held prisoner in their apartments because the elevator has been out of service for four months. Withholding rent will get the elevator working, real quickly.





Police in Fresno, Calif. are seeking the public's help in identifying the burglar who broke into 91-year-old Marcella Miller's home and shot her in the face.

Judge Goes HAM on Conrad Murray, Sentences Him to 4 Years in Jail

Former doctor Conrad Murrary, who was convicted of killing pop star Michael Jackson earlier this month, was sentenced to the maximum of four years in jail today -- but not before Los Angeles Superior Court Judge Michael Pastor gave him a verbal smack down from the bench (watch it in full, below). Judge Pastor said Conrad made an "egregious series of departures from the accepted standard of care" that represented a "disgrace to the medical profession -- an honorable profession which bears the blot, the scourge, of what happened here." He added: "It should be made very clear that experimental medicine is not going to be tolerated. And Mr Jackson was an experiment. The fact that he participated in it does not excuse or lessen the blame of Dr. Murray who simply could have walked away and said no as countless others did. Dr Murray was intrigued by the prospect and he engaged in this money-for-medicine madness that is simply not going to be tolerated by me." One aspect of the case has baffled us since it was introduced during opening arguments and that's the recording Conrad made of a drugged-out Michael. He never explained why he made the recording, but Judge Pastor had a theory. "I can't imagine that happening to any of us because of the horrific violation of trust," Judge Pastor said. "That tape recording was Dr. Murray's insurance policy. It was designed to record his patient surreptitiously at that patient's most vulnerable point." Judge Pastor also berated him for his lack or remorse and the documentary which aired a couple weeks ago, in which Conrad blamed Michael for his misfortune. While the judge -- like Michael's family and supporters-- wanted Conrad to rot in jail, the 58-year-old former doctor will not serve that full sentence, because of California's Criminal Justice Realignment Act, which prohibits sentences for certain felonies from being served in state prison. The LA Sheriff's office announced that Conrad will serve a little less than two years behind bars and he will be housed in a one-man cell and kept away from other prisoners. Conrad has been in jail since his conviction an a probation report released today said he was classified as "mentally disturbed" and "suicidal." He will really try to kill himself -- and get completely gray -- when the Jackson family sues him for $102 million to recoup monies Michael would have made from the This Is It Tour and funeral expenses.

Here's Judge Pastor ripping convicted felon Conrad Murray a new one before sentencing him.

Sweden Considers Banning Bestiality

We've done our fair share of pointing out sickos who've either lost their virginity to animals, or the gentlemen who've repeatedly assaulted horses, or, most recently, the gentleman who went three rounds with a dog, but in Sweden you can slay as many cats, dogs and farm animals you like and authorities don't bat an eye.

After years of debate on the issue, a new proposed law on animal welfare suggests the outlawing of sexual encounters with animals in Sweden, a practice previously decriminalized in 1944. ”We know that there is a great risk of the animals being used this way are harmed by it,” said Eva Eriksson, County Governor of Värmland, who has been working on the new animal welfare law since 2009, at a press conference. According to Eriksson, the topic has been up for discussion over a longer period of time and she feels that "major societal changes" warrant a clear prohibition against sex with animals.”Today it is very easy, on the internet and other places, to encounter animals for sexual intercourse and there are also many more reports of this happening,” said Eriksson. She also clarified that this should not be confused with cruelty to animals, where people mutilate the sexual organs of livestock and to counter which there is already legislation in place. The new law, Eriksson underlined, would solely encompass the sexual abuse of animals for the perpetrator's own pleasure. ”This is about people who enter stables and perform sexual actions on horses or cows, which is not natural behaviour for the animal and isn't ethically justifiable,” Eriksson said. However, Eriksson added that the sexual stimulation of animals in the context of breeding or as part of veterinary medicine procedures is exempt from the law. A new animal welfare law has long been on the cards in Sweden, with the old legislation dating back to 1988. The ambition with the new proposal is to safeguard society's respect for animals and that the animal welfare law should counteract animal welfare problems, Eriksson said in her presentation.

source: The Local

Hmm, ya think!

WATCH: Stupid Human Tricks, Road Rage, Bank Tries to Evict 103-year-old Woman

And the donkey -- make that donkeys -- of the day are these two geniuses. Police say Shakir and Kadija Taylor robbed a bank in Forestville, Md. last month. They live on the same block.



Rapper Lil Boosie was sentenced to 8 years in prison after he pleaded guilty to three counts of conspiring to bring drugs into a penal institution. The charges stem from Boosie's attempt to smuggle drugs into Dixon Correctional Center once and into Angola State Penitentiary twice -- where he was already incarcerated awaiting trial for murder.





Crystal Miller says she was minding her business and driving down a highway in Houston last week, when a lunatic exited his car, punched his fist through her window causing a laceration to her chin. The man says he felt disrespected because Crystal was giving him the finger and cursing at him.





Vanessa Rincon, who viciously stabbed her 3-year-old son while high on meth because she thought he was possessed by the devil then begged to be put to death, ha pleaded not guilty by reason of insanity. Yeah, good luck with that.





Did you ever wanted to know who bought all that crap from QVC and HSN? Meet Christine Brams. Over the last two years, she's been hoarding $50,000 worth of crap from those home shopping networks and now she's donating said crap to Volunteers of America to help homeless veterans.





Kevin Hogan, an English teacher and crew coach at Mystic Valley Regional Charter School in Malden, Mass., will probably lose his job after a reporter at WFXT was trolling gay p0rn sites and found that Kevin was a p0rn star, going by the name Hytch Cawke, before he became a teacher last year. (He's actually a well-liked teacher.) Mr Cawke, who's apparently straight and married to a woman, had no comment.





We're loving us some Vinia Hall. Early this morning, representatives from the Atlanta, Ga. Sheriff’s office knocked on the 103-year-old's door with an eviction notice because she owes $20,000 on an outstanding loan for this house. Ms Hall says she thought the home was paid for, but her grandson (or someone) re-financed the home.





Eight people -- including a 3-year-old boy -- were shot on the set of rap music video outside a liquor store Monday night in West Oakland, Calif. The child was shot in the head and is in serious condition. If you know anything, call police.





The tranny cement-in-the-butt case in Miami is apparently huge news. It's a slow news cycle, obviously. So, the local NBC affiliate interviewed the main suspect's attorney who says his client is innocent, the accuser is a liar and the prosecutors have no case. Sheesh, what else would you expect him to say?




In New Orleans, a tranny is caught on surveillance tape stealing thousands of dollars in designer clothes from a boutique. The thief has hit the same shop twice in one month.




It could be us, but we find these people, who are opposing the building of a 50-home, low-income rental neighborhood in Martinez, Ga., are a tad bit racist.





Debbie Dalton has agreed to give co-worker Bill McIntier a kidney.





A woman suffering from breast cancer who was pulled over for speeding while on her way to the hospital, says the cop should've provided her an escort to the hospital.




Meanwhile, in Stow, Ohio, 23-year-old Chelsea Garrett is planning to sue the police department because she was Tasered after fled the scene of an accident. (Chelsea says she's diabetic and had a blackout.)




Do you have some extra coins? You can help Tavetta Washington bury her 6-year-old son, who was struck and killed by a day care bus. Don't worry, Tavetta won't be in the poor house for much longer, she's gonna sue that day care company for everything not locked down.





This video is old, but it's new to us.

WATCH: Pumping Party Casualty, Mothers Go Batsh*t Crazy, Brazen Jumpoff

Last week, Miami police in Miami arrested Oneal Ron Morris -- who was rebuilding women's bodies with cement, Fix a Flat, mineral oil then sealed the incisions with Super Glue -- when one of those clients was hospitalized in serious condition. Since the story became public, several other victims have gone to police and now we're getting a good look at Oneal's work. It's not pretty. Rajee Narinesingh, a transsexual who's disfigured after getting her cheeks, lips and chin did two years ago told WTVJ she heard of Oneal by “word of mouth” in the transsexual community and decided to have her perform the surgery because it's cheap. As they say: The cheap comes out expensive. Marinate on that. And furthermore, why haven't you gone to police, Rajee? Are you looking to become famous? *side-eye*




Woooooooowwwwwww! A British woman riding the Croydon Tramlink in south London, went on an epic racist rant last weekend -- with her baby on her lap. The woman, identified as 34-year-old Emma West, was later arrested and charged with a racially aggravated public order offense.




Zainab Bibi, 32, of Pakistan is facing murder charges after she killed her husband, Ahmad Abbas, last Tuesday then chopped him up and made a stew. In an interview broadcast on local TV, Zainab said she killed her husband because he wanted a physical relationship with their daughter -- and said she did not regret her actions.





We'll show you crazy! This afternoon in Atlanta a woman threw her 8-year-old son out the window out a window in their home before stabbing her 4-year-old daughter to death. The boy survived and ran to a neighbor's home and called police. When cops arrived, the unidentified woman barricaded herself in the home, so cops broke down the door of the home and found the woman sitting in a chair repeatedly stabbing her daughter and she refused to put down the knife. That’s when police shot and killed her. Neighbors say the woman was experiencing difficulties raising the children, but with all the resources available in this country, there is no reason to kill your babies.





This lady ought to be ashamed of herself! Ginger White, an unemployed Atlanta "businesswoman", claims she had a 13-year-long affair with Republican presidential candidate Herman "9-9-9" Cain. Instead of praying to Jesus (or whichever God she praises) for being a home wrecker, she went on a local TV station to tell her story. Ginger claims the affair ended eight months ago, but planned to keep it a secret -- that's until she felt like Herman Cain "demonized" the other women who claimed he abused them. Ginger is a noted liar who's in deep financial straits -- so take her allegations with a grain of salt. (FYU: While we don't agree with Herman Cain's politics or believe it when he says he hasn't jumped off with this woman, he has gone on record to say he adamantly denies her claims.)





Poor Bryant Miller. The 47-year-old man from Detroit says his crackhead brother stole his identity in the '80s and has been pretending to be him since. When he gets arrested for committing crimes to feed his crackhead tendencies, he gives police Bryant's name and information then skip town. So, you guessed it, Bryant has been repeatedly jailed for his brother's crimes. But get this: He's pleaded and pleaded with police and the courts, telling them that its his brother who's committing these crimes, but the police and courts are not hearing it.





In Tavares, Fla., a black bear has been terrorizing citizens -- and even got into a fight with a pit bull.





Jasmine Adaway, 24, and Daffany Payne, 20, are facing child endangerment charges when they left their six kids (between 1 and 6 years old) in the car while they went to grab some deals at Walmart for Black Friday.





Meanwhile....these idiots are fighting over $1.28 towels at the Walmart in Atlanta, Texas....



...These idiots are fighting over 4GB memory cards at the Walmart in Oakland, Calif.



...A lady pepper-sprayed the crowd to get her hands on an Xbox at the Walmart in Porter Ranch, Calif.



...In Mesquite , Texas.



...At a Walmart somewhere...



...And at the Urban Outfitters in the Thousand Oaks Mall in California.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Joy. Happiness. Health. Oh, how could be forget, sweet potato piiieeee-hieeeeeeeee!!!!!! All these and many more are our wishes for you!

Sidebar: There will no posts until Monday. If you're new around these parts -- or don't get to visit us as much as you should -- here's some of what you may have missed.


BTW: Want to work off that delicious sweet potato piiieeee-hieeeeeeeee?

WATCH: Girl Sues Dad For Child Abuse, Shady Debt Collector, Company Refuses to Hire Until President Obama Leaves Office

Christine Logan, an 18-year-old Utah high school student, has filed 45-page civil lawsuit in US federal court against her father, Dave Logan, for child abuse, negligence, abuse and, oh, yes, attempted murder. Christine is acting as her own attorney and says her father beat her her badly she suffered "nerve damage in her left foot", her left pupil is permanently frozen and he tried ti poison her with alcohol. She tells the local news she has "two boxes of medical evidence that will help prove those injuries were not just a fall on the steps."


Some thieves are no longer robbing banks -- they're robbing you when you leave the bank.




Meanwhile, in Houston, this Mother of the Year, and her three kids are doing their shopping in the parking lots.




A Louisiana man "loaned" a burglar one - right in the shoulder.





If ever there's a reason to hang up on a debt collector, this is it. WOWWWWWW!





A Florida man's family has filed a lawsuit after he died when a hospital nurse gave him a drug used in executions. Richard Smith, 79, entered North Shore Medical Center in Louisiana on July 30, 2010 for shortness of breath. He died about a month later after a nurse mistook the paralytic drug for other medication.





Jennifer Fox -- a 19-year-old who claims she was three months pregnant but lost the baby after cops pepper sprayed her and kicked her in the belly during an Occupy Seattle demonstration on Nov. 15 -- is suing the city for "$10 million -- or maybe $25 million." Her own mother says Jennifer is a liar, but when reporter asked if she had proof she had suffered a miscarriage, or that she was even pregnant, Jennifer said she hasn’t been able to access her medical records but would sign waivers so that reporters could access them on Saturday, after a memorial service. So, we'll see.





Carl Griffiths, a 19-year-old from Britain, wears a size 21 shoe -- and you know, big feet means, well, you know. So many women are interested to find out, he's already slept with 30 women. "The ladies only want me for one thing. At this stage of my life, it doesn't bother me," he tells the Sun. "And yes, it is true what they say about men with big feet." But, is it as big as Everton's?




Hey, look! Dinner! After heaving rains in Mason County, Wash, on Tuesday morning, salmon can seen seen swimming across the street.





A knock-down, drag-out fight at a nail salon inside a Georgia Walmart sent a 17-year-old bystander to the emergency room with shattered teeth and a sliced chin.





President Obama may want you and business owners to do what they can to get us out of this economic downtown, but one business owner in Waco, Ga. is refusing to hire anyone -- until President Obama is out of office, that is. Bill Looman, owner of US Cranes, LLC, says he "can't afford it....I've got people that I want to hire now, but I just can't afford it. And I don't foresee that I'll be able to afford it unless some things change in DC." Due to his signs and stance, the Secret Service swooped down on his door step to ask some questions.





Occupy Best Buy campers (people waiting at Best Buy store in Roseville, Calif. for Black Friday deals) were served with eviction papers and their tents taken away.

Man Commits Suicide Hours After Getting Married

This is just sad -- and selfish.

A Bronx groom hurled himself into the Harlem River over the weekend — just hours after exchanging marriage vows with his longtime love. Fernando Brazier, 28, took the fatal leap after leaving a suicide note for his bride, Trudian Hay, at the front desk of the Radisson Hotel in New Rochelle, where the couple and family members spent the night after celebrating their wedding. “He said [in the note] he couldn’t take it anymore, and to take care of the kids,” Brazier’s sister, Shawna Weeks, told The Post. “He left his ring in the envelope.” Police sources said Brazier’s note told Hay that he could be found at the bottom of the river, not far from a Pathmark supermarket and Dyckman Street on the Manhattan side. Witnesses said the just-married groom walked out of the Radisson and into a cab sometime before 9 a.m. Sunday. He made his way to 55 Richman Plaza about 15 minutes away in The Bronx, where he jumped either from a building or the promenade behind it, police sources said. An FDNY Marine unit found Brazier’s body in the waters near Roberto Clemente State Park, slightly upstream from where he’s believed to have jumped, around 3 p.m., the sources added.

source: NY Post

If you're having suicidal thoughts, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at (800) 273-8255.

Lady Steals Man's Sperm, Gives Birth to Twins

Fellas, keep an eye on where you leave your sperm, because you could be in the same boat as Joe Pressil. The man from Allegany County, NY slapped Advanced Fertility Center and Omni-Med Laboratories, a Houston-based fertility clinic, with a lawsuit, after it surreptitiously got his sperm from a woman who claimed to be his wife and used it to impregnate her with twins in 2007. In his suit, Joe writes "due to the unexpected birth of his children caused by defendants [he's] suffered severe mental anguish and incurred economic harm due to substantial child support payments."

Pressil does not describe how the woman got his sperm without his consent or knowledge, but apparently does not contest that it was indeed his sperm. "Plaintiff, Joe Pressil ('Pressil'), suffered mental and economic injuries when defendants obtained his sperm without his consent or knowledge and in vitro fertilized a woman purporting to be his wife when she, in fact, was not," the complaint states. Pressil says that in February 2011 he found a receipt from Omni-Med for the cryopreservation of a sperm sample. The complaint does not state where he found the 3-to-4-year-old receipt. "Pressil was listed as the 'patient' on the receipt even though he had never been to Omni-Med nor ever sought treatment for male infertility," the complaint states. "Pressil immediately called Omni-Med and was referred to Advanced Fertility, the clinic who ordered the cryopreservation. Likewise, Pressil had never been a patient at Advanced Fertility."... "Advanced Fertility told Pressil they obtained his sperm sample from a woman purporting to be his wife, even though Pressil was not married, and in 2007 performed in vitro fertilization which resulted in the birth of twins. Advanced Fertility impregnated the woman with Pressil's sperm without his knowledge, much less his consent. Advanced Fertility's website 'strongly encourages' both partners to take part in an initial consultation, though Pressil was never consulted. Pressil first discovered his children were born through in vitro fertilization in February of 2011."

source: Courthouse News

Joe is suing the fertility clinic -- which shockingly continues to keep his "cyropreservered sperm sample" without his consent -- for negligence, conversion (of his sperm), conspiracy and violations of the Texas Theft Liability Act. He also wants the clinic to recompense him for "loss of opportunity", all of the monies he's paid in child support in the past and is expected to pay in the future and all costs associated with raising two children. Sidebar: We have a feeling he knew this woman and that's how he found out he fathered her children and she, like a chicken head does, had the audacity to then go after him for child support. Spiteful and disgraceful, indeed! But the bigger question is, however, why isn't he suing the woman, who presumably stole his sperm from a condom after they did they do? Maybe that will be an argument Advanced Fertility Center and Omni-Med Laboratories will bring up in their defense or, perhaps, Joe is planning to sue her down the line. Who knows. There's just so many facts that are unknown.

UPDATE: Here are some additional details. Joe is 36 years old. The woman is an ex-girlfriend, who told him she couldn't have kids. And as we suspected, a condom had something to do with it. Joe says his triflin' ex-girlfriend told him she needed him to use a special sort of condom during sex. He tells KPRC: "...Usually, a male would discard their own property, but she would always take the condom and she would run off out of the room and I just didn't think anything of it. And I didn't think that anyone could use a condom and bring it to a clinic to get an in vitro." The clinic's attorney called the lawsuit "suspect" and "disingenuous." We agree. Here's some fact not included in Joe's lawsuit: Joe had blood work performed and submitted to the clinic around the same time as the in vitro procedure. He also said the clinic has signed consent forms and information sheets from him. The clinic said some men don't like visiting fertility clinics, so some samples are delivered to the clinic without the man being there and, in this case, the specimen arrived in a cup that was sealed in a bag. The clinic's attorney also said that numerous procedures, including the successful in vitro fertilization which resulted in Joe's twin boys (who were born three months AFTER they broke up), were all billed to Joe's health insurance and his credit card. (Joe says he allowed his then-girlfriend to sign onto his health insurance as 'domestic partners' when they were dating, but he said he thought his insurance was being billed for treatment of the fibroid condition.) BTW: Joe is NOT suing the ex-girlfriend. Things that make go, hmmmmmm. Oh, wait! The woman says Joe (pictured, below) willing and knowingly agreed to the in vitro procedure and consented to her talking his sperm, he's just suing the medical facilities to avoid paying child support; She's willing to testify in court for the clinics. So, that, boys and girls, is why he's NOT suing her.

Woman Tries to Give Husband Away on Craigslist

A Utah woman fed up with her video game-playing husband listed him for sale on Craigslist. Alyse Bradley wrote on the posting: "Easy to maintain, just feed and water every 3-5 hours. He enjoys eating and playing video games all day." She admits the ad was just a joke, because her 22-year-old husband, Kyle, after he became obsessed with the game "Modern Warfare." Yes, that's the same video game that landed a Colorado man in jail.


source: KTVX

WATCH: Courtroom Follies; Woman Loses Friends on Facebook. Quick, Alert the Media!

Last Friday, on the scripted courtroom show "We the People with Gloria Allred" (a show no one watches), was this mess. "Maureen Andrews" filed a $10,000 lawsuit against her son's 39-year-old art teacher, "Kristen Crimsen", because she's been sleeping with her son, "Michael" since he was 15 years old. During a search of the Michael's room, Maureen found racy photos and an email Kristen sent him. This YouTuber didn't upload the entire story, but we were watching it that day in amazement. When asked to explain herself, Kristen told "judge" Allred: "I've never met anyone as special as Michael and I did try to resist the obvious attraction and chemistry between Michael and I, but as his advances continued it became impossible for me to resist." She continued: "There's so much scientific evidence that supports the bringing together of younger men and older women." Obviously, this ish is fake, but still, whaaaaaaat?! BTW: "Maureen" was "awarded" the $10,000 for emotional distress and "Michael" and "Kristen" are getting "married."



Michele Bump from Olive Branch, Miss., who was a victim of rape 18 years ago, says she found pair of underwear in her mailbox. She says her attacker, Jeffrey Hunter, who was recently released from prison, is responsible for putting the pair of draws in the mailbox.





A donkey gone do what a donkey gonna do. And Matthew Cardinale, who's from Atlanta, fell for the old "Pigeon drop" scam.






A Greyhound bus drive has some explain' to do. Last Friday, 45 passengers were on board the bus from Memphis, Tenn., to St. Louis on the female bus driver pulled over and stopped the bus on the side of the road Charleston, Mo. She told passengers she was leaving. She locked the door and went outside to wait for a ride. Passengers called 911 and Greyhound, but it took hours for them to send a new driver, so the passengers had to sleep on the bus.






Reshonda Tate-Billingsley, an author based in Houston, lost 1,200 friends on Facebook. She says someone hijacked her Facebook account earlier this month, created a Paypal account in her name and attempted to change her bank account password. While this is a frightening situation, it comes weeks before her new book is set to be released. *side-eye* (Sidebar: Both police and Facebook say no crime has been committed, therefore they can't get involved.)





When cops in Florida tried to pull over a speeding van early Sunday morning, the driver led them on a high speed chase. Eventually the stopped, but not before backing up into a police cruiser. Cops was able to apprehend the driver -- 27-year-old Susan Bryan, who was in the van with her three kids. Cops say the kids -- who are 3, 5 and 8 years old -- were full of dirt, lice and open wounds, and say none had shoes on.






Trevor MacDonald and Jesse Pierfelice found love in a hopeless place -- while waiting in a Black Friday line outside a Target.





Last week, a teenage boy walked into Airsoft and Hobby World in Santa Clarita, Calif., submitted a resume, but before leaving, he stole a toy gun worth $129. Since all of his information was on file, the folks over at KTLA showed up at the boy's home to find out why is he's an idiot. Is it just us, or, if this boy were black or Hispanic, wouldn't the cops have showed up at his home and threw him in jail? Just sayin'.





Meanwhile, in Atlanta, here's a case of the inequalities in the judicial system when it comes to celebrities and us regular folks. After pleading guilty to drug possession, Mecca Hawkins Marson was sentenced to five years probation -- but jailers read that as five years in prison. After two years in prison, Mecca was released.





Meanwhile, in Jacksonville, Fla., a swarm of bats is terrorizing residents of an apartment t complex





In Annapolis, Md., a coward is on the loose after beating 92-year-old Neil Godden with a cane and robbing him of $20. If you know anything, call cops.





At 85 years old, Elizabeth Janet Reilly is one month away from becoming a college graduate.





Georgia is the epicenter of illegal pill mills. Here's a monthly-long investigation conducted by WXIA.

Week in Review: Patti Knows Best

Hey, boys and girls. Make it a great weekend. We'll be back Monday; you should, too. (UPDATE: Absolutely nothing happened over the weekend or on Monday worth repeating, so we'll see ya Tuesday!)

While we're away, if you have a tip about a story or something we should look into, post or get a chuckle from, please direct it here.

Here are some of the week's lowlights (and some highlights, too).

1. Legendary diva Patti LaBelle got into a screaming match with an 18-month-old baby then threw a bottle of water at the baby and her mother.
2. A panhandler punched a man for only giving him $2.
3. A lady gave a man a professional in the back seat of a police cruiser.
4. Cops swooped down on a tranny who injected cement into a woman's butt!
5. We watched thousands of demonstrators march through the streets of NYC during the two-month anniversary of Occupy Wall Street.
6. A grandmother grabbed a would-be kidnapper by the balls.
7. A donkey who hired a 32-year-old man off Craigslist to babysit her three babies was SHOCKED to learn he sexually assaulted one of them.
8. These were the videos that had us transfixed and sometimes questioning why human beings are the way they are: These, these, these, and these.

Lady Hires 32-year-old Man Off Craigslist to Babysit Her Kids. Gee, What Could Possibly Go Wrong?

And the donkey of the day is...the Houston woman who hired Steven P. Knox -- a 32-year-old man whom she found on Craigslist -- to babysit her three young children. The woman said Steven took care of her kids for a few months earlier this year, until he sexually assaulting the her 6-year-old daughter. The girl said the assault occurred four times last June. Steven was arrested Thursday and charged withaggravated sexual assault of a child under the age of 14. He's free on $30,000 bond.

source: KRIV